But in the last year of many changes and especially TWINS, things have often been more urgent and desperate. You know, holding a baby who will not fall back to sleep at night again, laying in bed listening to someone crying back to sleep, coming to the end of a tough day. Nothing spectacular, just beyond my control.
This is the stuff that drives me to ask for God's help. But with the burden of all these kids and responsibilities, the last thing I need weighing on me is the need to pray only in a way where I "help" God show up, either by Bible verses or being all spiritually in tune. (Maybe he'll show up in that way, but maybe not. Maybe that's not the point at all.)
So this is how I've been praying lately. "Rest." "Peace." (No, not rest in peace dear babies! :)) "Patience." I'm literally out of words/thoughts/energy/spirituality to say more. I think God gets the message just fine. Maybe he even prefers it that way sometimes.