I subscribe to SHAPE magazine off and on, whenever they've got a $5/year type special going on. Mostly, I like the new workout ideas, but they also have pop culture in (very small) doses that I can handle. You know, two or three pages of beauty tips. Two or three pages of the cover celebrity's bio (the ones who have gotten fit after one, two, three kids are my absolute favorites!!). Two or three pages of fashion tips that I can almost copy and/or afford.
This month's issue came though, and provided little in the way of inspiration. I would have been disappointed, except that I found that nearly every single article had a title that could not have screamed more loudly: as for you, DO NOT try this at home!!! (if you are a sort-of-high-risk-pregnant-with-twins-mommy, that is.) The forty cent subscription was well worth the laughs I got just off the cover.
"Bikini body detox - beat belly bloat, drop pounds fast."
Doc's orders - second trimester - gain pounds fast for twins and deal with the nightly bloat. Oh yeah, and trade in the bikini for a tankini and hope it lasts at least half way through summer.
"Look 10 lbs. thinner. Instant tricks."
Dream on. Look 20 lbs. heavier by August. For the health of the babies!
"Sculpt every inch. Get flat abs, a toned butt and jiggle free arms."
Pad every inch with extra baby insulation. Kiss the abs and butt goodbye for at least a year.
"The best swimsuit for your body."
Maternity styles mysteriously omitted.
I seriously just cracked up reading these, and that was just the cover! Ahhhh, until, at last, I found the article hidden away at the bottom for pregnant girls like myself.
"PLUS! Tasty ice cream treats."
Now that's something I can do :).